Sunday, November 8, 2009

More of Stephen’s Rants & Raves

You know what really grinds my gears? How about film directors that can’t direct their way out of a holy sock? Examples of such a person you ask? Sure I have some examples to give you. First is Mark Steven Johnson, director of such gems as Daredevil and Ghost Rider. This guy is given the opportunity to tackle these major projects based on very popular comic book franchises and he craps all over them like a German porn star. The producers gave this guy a chance based on what? His first film, Simon Birch? Seriously? Directing a movie about a quirky “Little Person” kid gives you the accolades to take on Daredevil and Ghost Rider? Anyway my point is if he had half a brain he quit while he’s not ahead.

My second entry into this category is Bryan Singer, director of X-Men, X-Men 2 and Superman Returns. He has done some notably good work on The Usual Suspects and Valkyrie. Apt Pupil was ok. But holy crap did he screw up those X-Men movies! And don’t get me started on Superman Returns. My personal problem with Singer is that he has such a lack of detail when it comes to films based on already established medium, he fails to realize that fans of the source material like it when the film actually resembles said source material. Anyway Singer has potential to be decent but his visions need some serious fine tuning.

Another director I wish to mention is the infamous Uwe Boll, once called “The Kubrick of Crap” has been on a mission to make films based on popular video game franchises and make them as bad as humanly possible. It all started with 2003’s House of the Dead and Boll has tortured us since with some works of genius as “Alone in the Dark”, “BloodRayne” and “In the Name of the King”. Sitting through these films is even less fun than pulling body hairs one by one with a set of rusty tweezers.

What I ask of big Hollywood producers is, can you please get your heads out of your asses and hire Directors that are actually qualified for these films? You know the guys that have done good films that are similar to the ones that you are trying to get made? How about that? It’s called logic.


  1. I agree to some extent Stephen, I happen to like the X-men movies. But the rest is how do u say...C-R-A-P

  2. No. You're right the X-Men films are very entertaining to the general audience. But to hard core fans of the comic they are mondo crapola.

  3. While I do like some of Bryan Singer's films, he does lack the ability to present strong female characters in his movies. I was very disappointed with his use of Rogue in the Xmen films. She was my favorite character in the cartoons but Singer played her down and made her wimpy. This did not get any better with Superman Returns, Lois Lane's character was very disappointing in this movie.

  4. You ain't lying. You are definitely right about Rogue being waaaay too somber. Plus Wolverine does not look like a Calvin Klein model. He's short and furry. Also Halle Berry so sucked as Storm! Storm is African. Halle Berry is barely African American. Anyway those are just some of the details that could have been changed for the better.